Transmogrified!
by Iori Branford
Summary: Rikku invents a weird new machina, setting the stage for a day of craziness...that hasn't yet been written, so hang in there...


Yuna Braskasdotter was still tired.

Her hand brushed stray hair from her face as she flung herself out of bed. The world blurred in and out of focus all around her. Her eyelids flickered, silently but resolutely begging for just a little more sleep.

As she made ready to get to work, thoughts swam lazily in Yuna's head. She had long understood that the duties of a Summoner entailed far more than conjuring the gargantuan beasts of their dreams. Healing the wounded and sick, ministering to the dead, traveling across continents from one temple to the next – who could blame the many student Summoners who had suddenly remembered important dentist appointments and deserted the Order of Yevon? "A Summoner never sleeps" was the catchphrase of the time. Nor did it help that she in particular also had the lecherous Seymour Butz Jyscalson to put up wi—

"Hiyeeeeeee!" sang a girl's voice.

Yuna blinked harder. The upside-down, smiling visage of Rikku de al Bhéd solidified before her.

"Top of the morning to you, too, Rikku," Yuna sighed wearily. "What're _you up to? Playing Spider-Man?"_

The smile turned indignant. "You wrong me, girl friend," she pouted. "My super-reinforced Grappling Hook Arrow would outsell that punk's flimsy-ass webs any day!" Sure enough, stuck in the ceiling above Yuna was a thin shaft from which hung the stout length of cord that held Rikku in midair.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway," she continued as she lowered herself back down to earth, "I think you're overworked, so I've got a little something planned for today!"

"Sorry, I'm booked."

Rikku's eyes swam with false tears.

"What kind of fun exactly?" 

"Oh! I'm _so glad you asked!" The bright smile returned. "I was wondering if you'd like to be my first—er, help me test out my Transmogrifier machina!"_

"Transmogrifier? _Machina__?__ You know how almighty Yevon feels about—"_

"It's safe, easy and fun!" Rikku cut her off. "Type in some animal, step inside, have someone press the Change button, the door closes, and blam! You're whatever animal you typed in!" Her expression then shifted from excitement to avarice. "It's also the first of its kind, so it'll sell for millions!"

Yuna did not look nearly as thrilled. As Rikku dragged her to her room, the young Summoner grimly reflected on_ the horrors humankind inflicts upon itself in the name of science and capitalism._

The Transmogrifier machina sat in the corner beside the door. It was little more than a cylindrical chamber with about enough room for three average-sized men. A screen, a tiny keyboard, and a large red button marked _Change protruded from one side._

"OK, you're in!" Rikku chirped as Yuna stepped into the tube. "Now throw me an animal!"

"Um…" Yuna thought for a moment.

"C'mon, something! Anything!"

"You know, I'm not quite sure," Yuna called back. "If Wakka finds out about this, he'll read me the Riot Act for sure." 

The strong, hardheaded Blitzball player did not frighten Rikku in the least. "Bah, it's no big deal," she scoffed. "Fine! If you can't think of anything, _I'll think of something!"_

"Rikku—"

"How about a flamingo? Flamingoes are nice."

"Rikku—"

"Or a kitten? I love kittens!"

"Rikku—"

"What about a dove? Light, graceful, and all that, just like you."

"_Rikku—"_

"Or a squirrel? Squirrels are sooooooooo cute—"

"_RIKKU!"_

Rikku jumped. "Huh?"

Yuna sighed. "I suppose, umm, the world could always use another fox—"

"A fox? O-_kay!" She input __fox with a __clack-clack-clack._

"No, Rikku, wait, I didn't mean—"

Rikku pressed Change.

She did not see the door swing open behind her and strike her in the rump. She flew into the chamber, landing on her face with a _thud._

Yuna's heart froze as the doors slammed shut, locking them both in whirring darkness.

Tidus Jechtson glanced perfunctorily about the young inventress's room.

"Yuna? Rikku?" he called. 

Hearing no answer, he shrugged. "One day I'll find out what those two are always doing together," he mused as he shut the door again.


End file.
